People will naturally test you; expect it. They’ll throw two different type of tests at you: Shit Tests, which test congruence, and Hoops, which test compliance.

Shit Tests

These sly tests measure the congruence between your exterior and interior. In other words, they challenge your presented personality to see if it matches your true personality. Shit Tests come in many forms: compliments, questions, comments, touches, and more. I cannot even explain how subtle these are; maybe some examples will help illustrate this point:

Wow, do you work out?

Do not be fooled by this question. It seems like a harmless compliment, but when we peel back the layers, it turns out to be a ruthless Shit Test. Here’s the thing, if you say “Yes, thank you.” as a reply, she knows that you worked out to impress people - for other people’s acceptance - which directly contradicts your nonchalant actions thus-far. You allow much less value-damage by pretending to not hear her and saying “sure,” “yep,” or “right.”

Hey, I like your hair.

This is the exact-same situation; do not acknowledge the compliment.


These are easy to spot with some practice. All Hoops demand investment from you, so get in the habit of asking yourself, “Will replying to this mean I’m investing into her?” If the answer is ever “Yes,” you need to demand investment from her. Basically, when she throws up a Hoop, you throw up your own; if and when she jumps through your Hoop, you can then jump through hers.

Here are some examples of Hoops you may see:

Here are some Hoops you can throw up in return:

I would argue that one of the best things a girl can do is test you because it gives you such a great opportunity. The purpose is not to pass their tests, not to fail their tests, but to not even take them; in bypassing their tests, you maintain a high value, while also showing fortitude.