If you have an epic story about how you became who you are now, then you, my friend, have a Grounding Story! Grounding Stories are very useful when building both attraction and comfort. The Demonstrations of Higher Value embedded in the story flip attraction switches, while the story itself utilizes the Time Distortion Effect, building mass amounts of perceived time investment, attraction, and comfort.

I suggest starting this story out with your Vulnerability Story, that way you end up with a nice pheonix theme with you rising from the ashes (so to speak). When you finish your Grounding Story, the girl to whom you told it should feel as though she went on your ride with you.

Have you ever felt like you knew someone for your entire life, even though you barely knew them? That feeling can be manufactured using both a Grounding Story and Simulated Deep Rapport Conversation, which can be found in Rapport. Use them well.

Note—When you tell the story, make sure to use all those nifty vocal and speaking tools you learned earlier—they add depth and excitement to an otherwise possibly boring autobiography.

Here’s an example:

So, I got sad for a while. Okay… longer than a while. Months in fact. But anyway, that’s not where I want to go with this story; my dad noticed my lack of social success and forwarded me an email from this ‘Dating Guru’. I laughed at first—the guy advocated being Cocky and Funny. Nonetheless, I clicked “subscribe” at the bottom of the email. The next thing I knew, I got popular! Me—Captain Anti-Social—I mean, I had a Ph.D in having no friends, and there I was—popular.

Well, before I knew it, I had more friends than I knew what to do with! and more girls than I ever dreamed! In sixth grade I had 3 girlfriends: Abbie, Amber, and Amy—the alliteration kills me every time.

When I moved back to America, though, I was sent straight back to square one; my sophisticated jokes did not appeal to the sensibilities of the kids here. Oh well. I had been a loser before, so it didn’t bother me too much. Plus, it gave me time to expand my knowledge; I read and watched and listened to everything I could about Social Dynamics.

Then, when I went off to Exeter Summer session, I really tried it all out—all the information I had taken in about how people work—4 years worth. It was amazing. I was king for 5 weeks during the summer after 8th grade. I was a living legend. Finally, I had used everything I learned, to great effect, I may add.

When I got home I started teaching officially; though, at the time I had no company, no website, no book—just me, a notebook, and a student. Since then I’ve really grown my business; I made my own website, which at first looked like crap, but I’ve made it a LOT nicer; I made a forum online, which has helped dozens of guys from all around the world—this one guy, Dack, well, I’ve GOT to tell you his story, he’s really a changed man—anyway, now I employ 5 instructors, I’m a published author, I’ve been interviewed on internationally recognized podcasts, I’ve spoken at several international conferences, held my own seminars in several cities, and I’m leading a teenage social revolution. All because Helena said “No.”

Pick a hardship you went through that contributed to who you are today—form your Vulnerability Story from the first section, then make a list of events caused by the hardship that led to a good result: this is your Grounding Story.